Six Signs of an Emotionally Abusive Man
Abusive men are not always easy to identify, at least not at first. After all, the insulting or overbearing behavior will not likely lead to a second date let alone a long-term commitment. However, even the most talented actor cannot hide their true nature for long. If he is not the kind and caring person that he appears to be, the truth will eventually come out. Consider the six signs of an emotionally abusive man, and decide for yourself if it is time to move on.
Unfair Stereotypes – Insulting Victims
Emotionally abusive men have ways of indirectly insulting their victims, and they have little respect for women. Stereotyping is just one of many ways to indirectly inflict emotional damage. When seeking signs of an emotionally an abusive man, consider his offhanded comments. Keep in mind that disparaging remarks about women are all-inclusive. His insulting generalizations might seem to be about others, but they are likely meant for you.
Insults Disguised as Jokes
A good sense of humor is a plus in any relationship, but not when jokes are insulting. A joke is not funny when it carries threads of truth and negative implications. Uttering unkind remarks while smiling does not lessen the sting. Jokes should never be offensive or cruel. Directly or indirectly and deliberately trying to insult a significant other is emotional abuse, and it should not be tolerated under any circumstance.
Blaming Others for Problems
When looking for signs of an emotionally abusive man, consider how often he blames others for his blunders. Some people have a very hard time admitting fault, and they strive to appear intelligent and blameless. They rarely let their guard down, and their pride is artificially inflated. Instead of accepting fault and moving on, they point an accusing finger at others. More often than not, they blame an ex or another woman. Ironically, she was probably also a victim.
Men who are emotionally abusive have a hard time keeping their temper in check. They hold back while in the presence of their superiors. They know just when and where they can get away with angry outbursts. Since they do not possess healthy coping skills, they eventually explode. More often than not, they take out their frustrations on an innocent person, but not just anyone. It is usually a significant other or another woman who tolerates bad behavior. They know who they can safely abuse without losing their job or their public reputation.
Direct and Indirect Selfishness
It takes a very selfish person to emotionally abuse a significant other in any sense of the phrase. A person’s most prized possession is their spirit, and an emotional abuser will crush it to bits with inattention, inconsiderate actions, and mean-spirited words. When seeking signs of an emotionally abusive man, consider his level of self-interest. If he only shares when he stands to gain, he does not have your best interest in mind. His actions are self-serving, and you will never become a real team.
The Emotional Rollercoaster
It is impossible to maintain happiness with an emotionally abusive man. Just when you think that all is well, he will snap you back to reality by expressing how he really feels. One day he might speak of the future while including you in his plan. Other days he will only use the word me, and you will feel like a doormat. Conflicting comments are what keep the emotional rollercoaster going, and just when you think that all is lost, he will utter something promising.
If He’s Controlling
If the man in your life is controlling, mean and emotionally abusive, forget about trying to change him. Do not make the mistake of falling in love with who he could be. It will never happen. The old saying that a skunk cannot change his stripes carries a lot of truth. A good man treats all woman with genuine kindness and consideration. True love is not marked by pain or confusion. If he makes you feel like less of a person, stop looking for reasons to end your affiliation or insist that he seeks therapeutic help. You deserve a much better life.